Finally

I, how about next time, I don't begin with I. But for now since I have started with I, then I shall continue with I. LOL, I think I just got a bit carried away there with the I.

Exams for me are over. Personally, I don't really care. I prefer being put through under all that stress and it makes me feel good that I'm doing something worth my time instead of wasting it on pointless things such as this. However it is actually quite annoying waking up early to go to school for 2 hours then have to leave again. It's a huge waste of time. They might as well tell us to go to school. But then we'd have less time to study. So, engineering. It was pain. Like I knew, that in my head I could do it. But nothing seem to come out. I had a mind blank.Which is common and so I probably shouldn't really be complaining. And also it's over now, so it's too late to do anything about it. I guess highlight of the day was really spending time with Lara and surprisingly Anavi whom we saw at the station and tagged along with us. So yes it was a really nice day which consisted of food which I've been craving so much. Out of my two cravings FOOD was the ONLY ONE which SATISFIED me. Yes, bitch, that was directed at you. I don't know if youre reading this but just in case I'll email you the link and make sure that you do read this even if it's just that ONE LINE. Yeah, so anyways we had waffles and man, oh my effing gosh, that filo waffle place at blacktown. It could nearly match up to Max Brenner but they have a totally different variety of food and selection etc, but no one cares about that because oh my gosh it was just soooooooo freakin' good. Man I was so full after, but it was a treat for getting through the exam with no worries, that was a lie, hahah but yeah. SO FREAKIN GOOD.

After the whole reward expedition, I had TAFE and the best and best exam ever. It was practically open book for BOTH prac and theory when it was suppose to be only for prac. So if I still manage to fail that exam, I will be so disappointed and eat more chocolate.

Apart from that I really don't have anything to say because I'm just so happy and not full of hate, not that I'm ever full of hate. Hate is bad. Be good, be nice to people. Or if you can't be nice, don't talk to people. That's my motto. Hahah.

laters bychezzzz

Never

So I'm on a roll today and yesterday. Seems to be what I've been doing with every aspect of my life. Procrastinating with every single thing that I do. It kinda reminds me of Hamlet. I really did love that play, I don't understand why people complained so much. Maybe they just did't put the same effort that I'd put into it.

the face of a virgin

Sex is overrated. A person's virginity, also, overrated. It has nothing to do with what I'm about to say. I just wanted to mention that. Anyway there's a huge part of me which really dislikes my current school. I don't know if it's the teachers, the students, or just the strict school environment. Whatever it is, it always gives me the shits and makes me dread going to school everyday. It's true that, fuck forgot what I was gonna say, but it's a getaway, maybe for some. I guess so actually. At one stage in my life I used school to, no wait I didn't. School has been the source of all my problems and why of all schools did I have to go to this one. However if that happened I probably would have never met my boyfriend and if I'd stayed at my old school I can safely say that I'd be pregnant by now. So that's a positive thing. It doesn't change any of the other things that have happened and occur. The people aren't what they seem and for goodness sakes they're all the biggest fakes. I swear I just want to scream at their faces and punch them. I've actually imagined it over and over again. What's stopping me? Not my parents that's for sure. That's what I love them, they allow me to retaliate if I'm being bullied or hurt because they can't stand me being treated like that, and also it's just plain karma, something, for some reason, I deeply believe in. I guess the only stopping me is my education. I've worked so hard to achieve what I've achieved and starting something just wouldn't be worth it.

The words just stopped coming out. I guess that's it for today, hopefully. I really need to study for that exam. I hope to do well and be number one girl. Hahaa,

laters bychezzz

I Can Do You Like That, That, That

We all know that today was the first day back to school. I expected it to be quiet and not as joyful. At a few times this was the case but then again, on days when everyone is there those 'moments' occur too. Especially if you're me. Today was also my first day in SRC. I don't know if I should be writing it here but this is how I feel and thought. At first I thought SRC would be a great and fun experience and have the chance to represent my grade etc. Once I did get the position I started feeling regretful because I didn't quite expect to receive a position as such. It wasn't right and I don't like it when things aren't right. I don't know. I don't think this is the right time to say it and I will leave it for later. Gosh, I feel so stupid today. Not just because of this but nothing would register and I found myself just staring at the wall or the ground or whatever and whenever people spoke to me I would just be in a world of my own. I was hopeless and I really did not like it. No more gay things. Today was good. People, leave me alone, seriously, let me do what I WANT to do.

Something came to mind when I read Exclamation Mark's blog. The one from the 14th. I didn't like it. Not as in it was a bad thing but it was more of a sad thing. But as I was told it's a person's blog and they should be able to express their own feelings. Well this is how I feel. Some people may look like they're taking their life and family for granted but inside it worries them shit. Because for me I try not to think about death and death altogether because it's not a funny topic. The thought of that happening to my family is sad and I don't want to talk about it. But I just want to make the most of now. The time I have with them. The time when I can be happy and have no worries because one day I will have worries but I don't want to waste this time. I just want to feel good and satisfied and lucky, lucky to have all that I have. Why make more problems when there's enough problems out there. AAAHhh, I've overdone it again. Stuff it.

GOODBYE.

1.08AM

So here's the update. I've completed my layout, for now. I'll try to keep things simple at the moment. Hopefully next week I'll have extra time to make a new layout because this one will get boring and it doesn't have enough extras and so on. As far as I know I feel great but the thought of school shits me hard and the footsteps I'm hearing because I'm not meant to be up this late. Not that it is late because I usually sleep at two. Anyways I'll keep this to a minimum, look at this pic I edited. I did at lot of things actually.

- cropped

- took a woman out of the background

- made my face smaller

- removed my imperfections

- added the text

- enhanced the images

people watch this: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fXKH5zgG8PA

2009/10 Capitans (Y)

Today it had occured to me that it was quite cold. You know like the cold where you just want to stay in bed for the whole day and do nothing but some people aren't that lucky. It was raining today and you know I didn't feel that today had much significance. Not for me anyway. I think I might just have to say one thing (plus extra little things, but ignore them anyway) and it's how one person and what that one person does. Makes me smile and continually keeps making me happy and I really appreciate it. Even though they may not be doing so on purpose I still feel that maybe they are that one person I've been looking for my whole life. Being in the rain with that one person, it felt good.

*School captains for 2009/2010 votings today. Who I voted for, it really didn't matter to me that much. They all say the same thing and don't do anything that actually help everyone. Just individuals who already have the help.

I'm not good. I mean that if you asked me, How are you?, my reply would be not good. Everythig, it's just happening. Exams, people. You know, all the stresses you can possible get. It's not right, I DON'T LIKE IT and once again, I'm not good.

laters,..

;]

I Have Great Dancing Skills

The sound of the pitter-patter against my window had waken me from my great dream. Sigh, I wished my morning was more fascinating than that. But it was just the ordinary alarm clock, beeping as it needed to.

Basically today was alright. I didn't do any work which was a bad idea but it was still pretty good especially that we had double periods because that was double classes of not doing any work. One thing which was really funny though was near the end of IST, I was listening to my iPod right and it go to Jessica Mauboy's Been Waiting. It's like a heaps good dancing song, well kinda but I started showing PJ how Jessica's moves were and how she would always do the same thing and I didn't notice that Jafar was right there looking at me and I was just like PJ! Well yeah. But i don't care. What other people think of me doesn't matter as long as I'm happy.

After school I had gone to the plaza with my couple friends, well apart from Sukhman so I was with him as we walked to the station. It was funny and like yeah. I don't know, I just kept my eye out because I knew papa was at penrith and he might get the wrong ideas, like this one other person (hhmmmm, kkkk) LOL, yeah. But it was fun. Enjoyable. :D

Laters,..
;]

What a wonderful world... or not.

Why, hello lovelies. I thought today would have been good cause like for once I was prepared for it. But you know, some days just don't turn out how you want it to be. And maybe because I did have a great day yesterday. Not everyone can have what they want.

School, what can i say. Things are happening quickly these days and I just don't know what to do. We had year assembly and lucky us we got a school photos back. And i would totally upload it but two reasons; 1. I don't want everyone to see my ugly and ewwy and very round face & 2. I don't actually have a computer copy and neither do i have a scanner so uploading it would be quite hard. I also have a new ID card, my fourth one of high school and I must admit it looks quite good. After assembly was first period; Commerce. Hmmm, how shall I put this. I guess it was boring but fun. And it's a bad idea to drink a whole bottle of cordial then hold you pee for a long time. So i ran to the toilet when the bell rang.

Period 2 was the start of my bad day. I come into class and the teacher's in a really bad mood. Then she speaks to us about our english narrativeand how bad it was. It was very saddening. The highest in our class was 17 out of 20. And that may not even be me. I tried so hard for that assesment and it's so annoying how i still get shit when i try my best. I don't know. I felt like crying. I don't want to fail English. What if i fail it in HSC, they'll like kick me out of Australia cause this is an English Speaking country and i can't even do an English exam. Shame on me, seriously. I'm gonna stop complaining but it just ruined my mood and preparations for maths exam.

All my studying, it paid off, well I hope so. Some of the questions in the exam I could do just like that, but i wasted so much time and i feel that i know i could have done better than what i did. Apart from that all I want to say is, Don't WISH ME LUCK. Seriously, don't.

Lunch was really uneventful. Just the way I liked it. For once it was nice not doing anything. Then the bell rang etc. Off to science which was fun because we did nothing. Like the teacher was there and all but all we talked about was people evolutioning and if they kept trying to fly off a cliff would they end up growing wings. Funny stuff. Oh and how Mahir doesnt have nipples but they're just discoloured skin. And the teacher called him discoloured, and someone shouts racist. Funny. HAHA. Then before i knew the bell had rung.

Friday, the end of the week. I felt like catching the train again. I had to make up a reason to go so i just said i needed to go to the library and i ended up going anyway. Train didn't exactly go as planned but then again, my day was already ruined so nothing was turning out right. I borrowed this book, it's called Sex stuff they don't teach you at school. It's funny cause i read the blurb at the back and it's like:

Josie Montano knew nothing about sex as a teen, and learnt heaps from doing research for this book. Now she thinks she's a sex goddess! (Um, can someone make sure her mother doesn't read this book? Great, thanks!)

Yeah, that's the funny thing, i don't know if u find it funny but i do. After i went home and fixed that stupid photo frame i bought yesterday and it was broken, but since i'm a very capable person and so I managed to fix it. Good as new. Now i'm tired and really in pain. Not swimming tomorrow so good.

Laters,.

;]

Athletics Day 2

How great was today?

Athletics carnival day 1 of 09 couldn’t have been any better. Maybe because it was some people weren’t there or just because it was really that fun.

It began by me waking up early and actually being bothered to get out of the bed and shower first up, which I don’t particularly like because the water is so called when you’re the first one to be using it. Anyways, yada yada, all the way to the bus stop. Today we had that cool Kiwi Bus Driver who once tried to start a drag race with a truck driver. He’s quite awesome because he took us to the oval unlike the other bus driver from yesterday who sucks big time and made us walk from school. I got off the bus and walked to the other side. I didn’t see anyone so I thought oh yeah, they’re not here yet. That’s when I decided to just sit there by myself all alone wondering to myself why the hell am I here all by myself like such a big loser. Then I was like stuff this. I looked at the schedule for the day then I went to the top of the steps and a few minutes later, luckily, Vinori came and I was no longer by myself.

The day had begun and we had to get our names marked off but before that I found the rest of the group waiting for me and MY mat, I don’t see the need for it but like yeah. There wasn’t actually any events that I had wanted to (excluding the 800m, I didn’t want to be the only one doing it with the white chicks) so I just sat on the mat, listening to music and that’s when I saw Sukhman and Sumeet playing with the soccer ball. Because I was bored, I thought that it would have been a good idea if I went up to them and disturbed their peaceful game and that’s what I’d done. While there I was slowly included in the game which I originally just planned to disturb but like whatever. Then along comes Katrina who just shouts my name and I’m just like, oh great. Because I know why she said that but I’m not publicly saying why she said that, NO WAY. Anyways then along comes Xu, it was kinda funny because even I could throw the ball further(which will help me in the future). Sumeet had to go and do his race then me, Sukhman and Xu was left. I decided that I wasn’t going to put up with this so I went to watch Sumeet’s race. Uhm, I cheered, for everyone actually. Himmat won. Kinda expected that. Tough luck for other people. Wait, he did win the 800m SPRINT right ? Hmmm. Anyways I went to say oh yeah good job etc. Then I put my hand out for a hi-5 and Sumeet was about to hit it then I was like Get back. AHAHAHHA! So funny. Then I did it to Sukhman and I was told that it wasn’t manly enough so I did it again and it was manly. Laugh Out Loud. Get back motherfucker, you don’t know me like that.

Jasmine left, because of the friken lazy, ass teacher we have and told her to give back their assignments cause she didn’t want to take it home. Oh my gosh, it’s only paper. Anyways I was with Sukhman and Sumeet again and a soccerball. Xu comes along, once again, and annoyed us. So firstly Sumeet was like only men can go and that didn’t work. So Sukhman was like ‘fine, Xu, if you can throw the ball further than Jasmine then you can stay with us’. He tried a few times but I win. AHAHAHHA! So he goes and we go play kicks? Yeah that. They were drop-kicking the ball right and I did it and they were laughing, I didn’t know why. I dropped the ball then I kicked it, what’s wrong with that. Then they told me. It’s not suppose to bounce back high, only low. And they I tried so many times but hey at least in the end I got it. While we were doing this Sumeet was reading my Italian speaking and because he’s not italiano he failed and he was trying to read. Here are some of the things which were mentioned:

- your mum smells

- your sisters fat and a pig?

- your pregnant.

As you can see he fails, like, majorly. Then we left. I don’t actually know why. Oh yeah. We got bored and I was thirsty so we went back. I got back and Emma was there and I was talking to her for a while. Then she left and I went back to the mat and the rest of the group was there and we were just talking. We sat on the edge thing and watched the 200m. It was awesome and I didn’t do it. YAHAHAH! Only because I’m so lazy and like seriously just could not be bothered. Then Vinori and Leanne came back after their race. And everyone was there and we were just talking. Then Madison came and he said I could take pictures. I took Vinori because she’s in Towers and she’s good with art and she could tell me if the pictures were good or not. On our journey of photo taking we had to go through different obstacles which we managed to overcome. The first one was teach Vinori HOW to use the camera. LOL. Then were to stand and tell her if it’s good or not. I thought she knew more about it. But yeah it was all good. We got to the boy’s discuss. They were juniors all right. Vinori told me ‘Oh, take a picture of that guy, he look’s pro.’ I click away and suddenly I hear the discuss land a few metres in front of me and I’m just like, OMG Vinori, so much for pro. Then we walked to javelin were we were high jacked by two people. HA, no it was Sumeet and Sukhman and the camera was taken from me and the ball was being thrown and kicked at me. Not fair. Where’s Anavi when you need her (LOL, jokes. :P ) Anyways they, or we, or whatever decided to have a water fight but we still needed more pictures. So we took the rest that we needed.

The next even which I was going to do was triple jump and like I did it and I just did it once. I couldn’t be bothered trying so stuff it. Er. I kinda forget what I did now. Let me think. Oh yeah. I was just walking around with Jasmine and like I saw that the 16yr Girls Discuss was on and like I did that, tried, but didn’t because I knew I had no chance so stuffed it. Right after this was the 100 m finals. I kinda missed all the girl’s races so I was just watching the guys and like seriously , it was full on race. And I was just like, I don’t like you all, grrr. LOL, but how could be people be so fast and im just so slow. I’m telling you, it really is because I’m fat but I don’t know why no one will believe me. Far Out, stupid people. Anyway, after that race was the teacher’s race and Mr. Mel ma, so tank seriously. If only he was a more cooler teacher then more people will like him. Oh well. Ah shit, relays.

The relays consist of the 4 houses (Blaxland, Lawson, Mitchell & Wentworth) with a team for each age group and sex. But since out house doesn’t have many people of my age groups I was selected. Well vinori didn’t want to do it and I didn’t want to force her, but next time I will. Anyways it was kinda hectic because everyone was just like trying to watch and everything was close then no it’s not. Then after a while of waiting for my race to begin, I saw Sumeet (who was also relaying) and I ran and jumped on him and kinda failed. Then he was like what are you doing, but really I think he was thinking, WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH HER? And I said I was bored and I was gonna go piggyback and he was like ok. So I jumped on and I was like YEY! I can see the race now. Suddenly, another one of those stupid teachers come along and tells him to put me down. Dayum. Sometimes there are downsides of being short. Geddit? Down, short. Uhm, yeah. DW. LOL. That’s when people were starting to be like really OMG, OMG, OMG, OMG and worried about the race and I was just like hmmm. Wentworth suck. HAHA. Then I had to get ready and go to my spot and that’s when the nerves kicked in and I was like what the hell did I get myself into. And butterflies in my stomach. Ah! Gunshot. Shit, shit, shit, shit, Like I was literally saying that to myself, what else am I meant to say ? Then Jillian comes and I run. Janine overtook me but no one else and I tried to keep up with her then I could see Louise and I’m like nearly there then I passed it to her. You know what happens in the end. Wentworth comes last, like always. So yeah. I watched the guys’s race too. I have to say the same thing about the guys, BUT at least, they had a better finish with the fancy dress. HEHE. Uhmuumumumum.

Yeah, the day was nearly over and like everyone as just standing, sitting, talking. Then Jasmine, AHAHAh, she get’s attacked to, like I did yesterday but there was no high jump mat which was quite a shame. Later we were standing as a group then two people come (I wonder who they were) and wet us. I really didn’t mind because it was REALLY REALLY hot and it felt good. Yeah. OMG, my hands are so bad at typing.

A meteor came and crashed into the world but it didn’t cause a BIG BANG but aliens were on it and wait, my bad AN ALIEN was on it and it was so big and it ate the whole world in one big bite.

Well, obviously that’s not how the day ended but a pretty good day. I have more pictures from today but I have to get them off Madison first so yeah. I went home and fell asleep then did this which took me quite a while. Like seriously.

Oh my effing gosh! I’m done.

Laters,..

p.s. I was told to write a story about how awesome I was with my dropkick by Himmat so did, well will. It will be the following post, but I will actually post it first so then you can just scroll down to see it. Get me ? So the previous post of this one but scroll down.

;]

Day 1: Athletics Carnival

It was great today. Er, I guess I could say that it was fun, eventful and it just felt good. Although I didn't really come anything in anything (but a special mention to my great SHOTPUT, i think it might be my PB, 6.34m with a 5kg shot). I was with Jess and Lara heaps today, maybe because they're in my age group and they're also in my house. I actually want to upload some pictures which I will do when I change computers. Apart from that it was actually quite enjoyable. Highlight, well not really. I was atacked by Sukhman and Sumeet. Well I'm making it sound worse than it really was. But they violated my personal space and I don't like that. Haha. Well yeah, but whatever. And I didn't feel so anti-social either because come to think of it I was with someone most of the time. And it felt good and not some stupid emo. Laughing my ass off. Special mentions to these people who made my day even more enjoyable and better:

• Vinori
• Jasmine
• Jess
• Lara
• Katrina
• Shirine

Er. I'm hoping I didn't miss anyone out. Plus if you weren't in that but included in the blog then that means you're a special mention too. One last thing about today. This, hmmm, I don't know what to call 'em so I'll say this dog is such a dog. Seriously just makes you want to puke and be like AARGH! get away from me. The way this dog acts is too much in your face and I can't believe that some people can't see that. Laugh out Loud. That's it for day 1. Pictures will be uploaded soon. Either this blog, new blog or on Extras. Whichever one I choose depends on my lazyness.

Laters.

;]

Pupil Free WHAT ?

Today, pupil free day for the selective schools in the area. I thought wow this is a great day to whatever I want. But instead I'm force to do what I don't want to do such as go out of the house. I just wanted to stay indoors under my warm blanket, but that couldnt happen because Sunshine turned the lights on and I was on the top bunk and ow my eyes hurt. Well before anyway.

I've done quite a lot of work today but I feel like something's missing and maybe that's because there's no school today and I totally missed out on the TV show I wanted to watch so therefore nothing. Just nothing. Haven't exercised for a while either. That should be done soon before I get more fatter. That reminds me I must check my BMI to see if I'm fat or not. I am, but I just gotta prove it to everyone.

Yesterday I found out how much people love me and I was telling my sister how I hated it that they do. Like I don't know. Being loved is such a nice feeling but there's so much work to keep up. Just another topic that I have to put out there. Must people try hard to be loved? When you get the answer to that please tell me.

A lot of thoughts came to my mind and it's just a yes or no. But whether it's the right thing to do or not then I don't know. I should think things through before I make any more bad choices. sigh.

laters,..
;]

School.

Back to school once again.
It's not that bad.
Well, at least I can breathe now.
I could before,
but I was running.
HAHA.
geddit ?

;]

HAHA, i'm not laughing

Over and over again
cause it's all in my head...

I woke up this morning, up and ready to go swimming. Lately, waking up in a Saturday morning I've felt more enthusiastic about going swimming. I don't know why this is the case but it's a good thing. I got there and Julia was back. Yey? And because I was there early she asked if i wanted to join the early class and I did it, which meant i finished earlier. Woo, I could do all the things she said EXCEPT for the fact that I couldn't breathe, but that's just me. So yeah.

Now i'm at home and like I'm doing the first part of the Healthy Assignment which I find a complete waste of time because it is. So yeah. While looking for info I came upon this (http://www.reachout.com.au/default.asp?ti=1866) I thought it was a good website and it really gave me help on what was wrong with me.

Why I'm feeling crap:

• You have experienced one or several big or small stressful events or tough times.

So yeah. It may have been cause by one of the following:

• Family problems
• Relationship or friendship problems - breaking up with someone or fighting.
• Starting at a new school or job.
• Being a carer or living with someone with a mental or physical illness.
• Feeling bored or unstimulated, e.g. in the school holidays.
• Not eating well
• Not getting enough exercise
• Not getting enough sleep
• Illness - being sick, or fighting off illness, can make you feel run down and unwell
• Hormonal changes in females during your menstrual cycle can make you feel crap. This may happen a few days before you get your period and you may not make the connection immediately.

As you can see it's not all of it, it's a few of those reasons. I'm not going to go into detail into that but yeh. I'm going to admit it. I FEEL CRAP. And the only thing I can do about it which will work is to express my feelings, but that will cause me to feel more crap and make the whole everything worse. So i will just deal with it and keep my mouth shut. My happiness doesn't matter, just as long as everyone elses is fine.

And just to get things straight now, I'm not emo. I don't fucking cut myself or even listen to emo music. I don't even dress emo. So fuck off. I'm not fucking emo.

Must finish this.

laters,.
;]

p.s.

WORD FEELING OF THE DAY:
"CRAP"

FRIDAY DAY DAY

it was sunny today

and i was happy

Last day of school spirit week it was very excitingly fun and sunny and such a bludge. LOL, it began with commerce and i did work, sumarized work LOL and it was very funny and exciting then i realised i was hungry and totally out of it and that commerce wasnt really fun. HAHA. Do i have to go through my day. Like seriously. Right now, as in RIGHT NOW i realised something. But maybe i shouldnt include it in the blog because this is a public blog and thi is a very private thing. But i'm really happy and like totally getting ober him. HAHA. I don't know why I'm laughing but like whatever. But theres something else connected to that, that only a few people know the reason to. Like I only get over people a certain way, and yeah. If you really want to know ( YES, im talking to YOU ...) then ask me, I may tell. But then again, I probably already told you. So yeah.


WORD OF THE DAY:

"BUBBLY"

note: I hate lunchtimes, I figured out that this is the cause of the downturn of my very good moods, so think about what you're going to do or say to me, before you do, because it could be you that changes me.

I caught the train. Laugh out loud.

laters,.
;]

random

today was really random.

we got to wear mufti today and all the money raised was going to the victims of the recent bushrfires in victoria. the thought of what happened to them makes you think about your own life but then again it doesnt. but yes. today was random. the clothes i had worn today one of my guy friends actually chose i for me. which i found quite odd but he does have a good sense of fashion because I guess i did look ok. in first period was had to go to a formal assembly which was extremely boring but we did get to miss out on commerce and I guess that would be so much better anyway. next period was Italian, this was probably the funnest subject I had today because of two of my friends and my brother were sitting next to me and they were quite happy and so was I and the fact the teacher wasnt there and we had the most clueless casual teacher. Anyways one of my friend said something about two months later i was going to be going out with a guy who was sitting right next to her and I was just laughing but I was like it would be too late, but i still manage to grin.

next period was maths and we had a stupid casual but it turned out to be ok i guess, everyone was just talking in the end and she didn't seem to mind. Lunch was eventful, events which i particularly didn't like. who wants to go up to a guy who liked one of your close friends and ask them if they still do (I'm so sorry Jasmine, I have to let it out). And i guess i did feel bad asking him. But we had this conversation and I just didn't know what to do and all I could think of doing was crying. But I managed to hold my emotions back and talk to another group of friends. Bell rang and those stupid guys started saying I'm seeing double & another Jasmine ? and i just got to the point where I would and did explode so I hit two of them and the deputy principal just happened to be there and it was Just My Luck. There was trouble, she was just like, next time tell me. and I was just like OK. Then left for English and just about to explode into tears, but then makeup was like on today so I was like, aarhh. not today. In english it was fun. I was just wasting my time and money and my story/character description was awesome. HAHA.

After school I was at the front wating with Kuya because, basically if i'd gone to the back I wouldn't really be doing anything anyway so i was just there. And I was glad to talk to him again. It seems like not complete me, but fixed a part of me which really needed a cool older brother who DOES care. Not that I can compare him to anyone else seeing as I dont have a blood brother. But soon they had to leave and I went to the back. Waiting there with people seemed to have made my mood change dramatically and I ended up being piss all the way home. Especially on the day they were all up the back having fun while I was being a silly little bitch sulking to myself and using music to cover up any emotion.

Now I'm just here, on the computer. I was reading but was told to clean up my room and I guess it's slightly cleaner. hehe. I'm gonna read some more, so I can read Breaking Dawn. I still don't see why everyone went crazy for the whole series of those books. HAHA
Laters,..