And sumeet, and my family.
I think that's as far as the love goes.
People often ask why I don't like people or my grade or people. I have pretty much not lost respect but I have just lost the bother to care because they themself don't have the respect for me. I mean, I'm a fucking chick. Have the courtesy to be nice at least or not rude maybe... I think I'm just extremely tired and need to release. Oh btw babe today is DAY 27 or 26, I think. Anyways I should probably talk to you cause like I think the reason I've gone for this long is cause I'm thinking too much, and instead of doing that to get me to sleep, I end up crying myself to sleep which I don't like because I look so fugly in the morning.
Yeah, challenge for you is to break my 26/7 day record. :P
Tuesday, May 31, 2011
Monday, May 30, 2011
Quite
pissed off.
I'm not gonna complain anymore than that cause it's stupid.
But it doesn't change the fact that I'm now in a shitty mood.
Karma, thanks.
I'm not gonna complain anymore than that cause it's stupid.
But it doesn't change the fact that I'm now in a shitty mood.
Karma, thanks.
Sunday, May 29, 2011
Adore
I absolutely adore my boyfriend and not just because he's extremely good looking but because he's a good person. He brings smiles to people's faces and he's there for people. He's caring, he's lovely, he's also quite tall and must not forget the hair on this boy. Overall he's amazing. I feel lucky to have him not only as my one and only boyriend but also a best friend. I think without him, I would be a mess, an out of control mess with no limits (see how I incorporated maths, hehe) and he's the barrier preventing me from continuing with the mess.
He makes me feel special and I love saying that he's mine, because I know, well he said, that he's mine and only mine, frankly because I absolutely hate sharing especially this guy. I feel bad when I do things that I may or may not be aware that he doesn't particularly like because I know that this upsets him. That and because it reminds me of Jess's and Daniel's relo, haha. We are nowhere near like that. I also think that where we are right now, ON TOP OF ALL THE BULLSHIT that has happened is a good place and I'm really glad that we're still as strong as we are right now otherwise I would be really sad if we weren't. I would do anything for him and I have and I hope that he has noticed that and I just want to make him the happiest boy in the world. Boy/tranny/girl whatever you wanna call it.
I stalk him. A lot. I like to know what he's doing and where he's at. Maybe because I'm insecure but knowing these things just calms me and in a way does make me happy. I'm finally a girl with a guy who she can rely on and think about and worry about and just have. Yes, have, own, mine, because I bought him. I bought him with all my love (and maybe tits).
He knows how to make me cry and he knows how to make me feel better. He's very mean sometimes, other times I worry that he's turning into a chick. I don't think I've met a guy as lovely as him and I feel really really really REALLY lucky. I don't ever want to let him go at the same time I don't want to prevent him from his potentials because it's so obvious that he can do better (like a blow up doll).
To summarise, he's mine and please don't ever, anyone, take him away from me, because if anyone did, I would be in absolut sadness.
i hate it when you choose poker over me.
it kinda feels like that's more important to you than I am, and it's annoying how you say when you say you want to spend more time together.
He makes me feel special and I love saying that he's mine, because I know, well he said, that he's mine and only mine, frankly because I absolutely hate sharing especially this guy. I feel bad when I do things that I may or may not be aware that he doesn't particularly like because I know that this upsets him. That and because it reminds me of Jess's and Daniel's relo, haha. We are nowhere near like that. I also think that where we are right now, ON TOP OF ALL THE BULLSHIT that has happened is a good place and I'm really glad that we're still as strong as we are right now otherwise I would be really sad if we weren't. I would do anything for him and I have and I hope that he has noticed that and I just want to make him the happiest boy in the world. Boy/tranny/girl whatever you wanna call it.
I stalk him. A lot. I like to know what he's doing and where he's at. Maybe because I'm insecure but knowing these things just calms me and in a way does make me happy. I'm finally a girl with a guy who she can rely on and think about and worry about and just have. Yes, have, own, mine, because I bought him. I bought him with all my love (and maybe tits).
He knows how to make me cry and he knows how to make me feel better. He's very mean sometimes, other times I worry that he's turning into a chick. I don't think I've met a guy as lovely as him and I feel really really really REALLY lucky. I don't ever want to let him go at the same time I don't want to prevent him from his potentials because it's so obvious that he can do better (like a blow up doll).
To summarise, he's mine and please don't ever, anyone, take him away from me, because if anyone did, I would be in absolut sadness.
i hate it when you choose poker over me.
it kinda feels like that's more important to you than I am, and it's annoying how you say when you say you want to spend more time together.
Saturday, May 28, 2011
What is today?
Today is saturday, tomorrow is sunday and the day after is SUMEET :)
I hate you bitch and your arms hehe. Anyways I ought to start writing more consistently like everyday so that I know what to write when I'm writing a blog and don't have to think about what to write. Basically, I think I feel in love just that bit more with this guy, or girl. I still don't know what his/her gender is. But like he/she makes me absolutely happy and I really don't know what my life would be like without him/her.
I love you.
Okay, because I'm so cool and magsasalita ako nang tagalog kaso nga lang hindi naman ako marunong pero wala naman magbabasa nito na nagsasalita nang tagalog at yung mahal ko lang naman and sasabihan ko kung anuman talaga an sinabi ko dito, ooh that really didn't make sense but gagawin ko to. Mahal na mahal ko yung lalaki nayon, alam nya...siguro, mahal din nya ako, sana naman. Pag hindi nakakahiya naman, pero an alam ko mahal din nya ako at nakakatuwa kasi xa yung unang lalaki na mabait and malandi (kung yun ang tama na word) pero nakakakilig talaga. Palagi akong ngumingiti kasi masaya xa at ginagawa nya yung tama and gusto and talagan special lang xa.
Oi, fat slut, if you want a trans. of that click this JASMINE'S A FATTER SLUT.
Nothing else to really talk about, I'm kinda happy right now except from all the eating. I don't know what's wrong with me. I don't stop eating now. Like NON STOP. And I was actually starting to lose weight. I swear if this is from all the exercise I've been getting I'm never exercising again :p
Anyways should get my study on laters bychezzz.
STAY FRESH 8D
p.s. i'm gonna do that assesment task for you now on the topic of Jasmine while I can still be bothered writing one. hehe
I hate you bitch and your arms hehe. Anyways I ought to start writing more consistently like everyday so that I know what to write when I'm writing a blog and don't have to think about what to write. Basically, I think I feel in love just that bit more with this guy, or girl. I still don't know what his/her gender is. But like he/she makes me absolutely happy and I really don't know what my life would be like without him/her.
I love you.
Okay, because I'm so cool and magsasalita ako nang tagalog kaso nga lang hindi naman ako marunong pero wala naman magbabasa nito na nagsasalita nang tagalog at yung mahal ko lang naman and sasabihan ko kung anuman talaga an sinabi ko dito, ooh that really didn't make sense but gagawin ko to. Mahal na mahal ko yung lalaki nayon, alam nya...siguro, mahal din nya ako, sana naman. Pag hindi nakakahiya naman, pero an alam ko mahal din nya ako at nakakatuwa kasi xa yung unang lalaki na mabait and malandi (kung yun ang tama na word) pero nakakakilig talaga. Palagi akong ngumingiti kasi masaya xa at ginagawa nya yung tama and gusto and talagan special lang xa.
Oi, fat slut, if you want a trans. of that click this JASMINE'S A FATTER SLUT.
Nothing else to really talk about, I'm kinda happy right now except from all the eating. I don't know what's wrong with me. I don't stop eating now. Like NON STOP. And I was actually starting to lose weight. I swear if this is from all the exercise I've been getting I'm never exercising again :p
Anyways should get my study on laters bychezzz.
STAY FRESH 8D
p.s. i'm gonna do that assesment task for you now on the topic of Jasmine while I can still be bothered writing one. hehe
Monday, May 23, 2011
Instead of English
I looked through my September 2009 Archive and found this: http://cuffsandheels.blogspot.com/2009/09/eyes-hurt.html
MY GOODNESS I LOOKED SO FAT AND UGLY THAN I AM NOW.
I haven't really improved much but still, I did not realise how fat I was. GAH
MY GOODNESS I LOOKED SO FAT AND UGLY THAN I AM NOW.
I haven't really improved much but still, I did not realise how fat I was. GAH
Honestly,
I'm in a horrible mood, all of a sudden and I feel like ranting because I seriously CAN NOT BE BOTHERED to do english and I think releasing some steam would be just so much better.
1. Apart from clubbing my birthday was not as fun as I had planned, it was way different than what I wanted in the first place and I guess that was my fault.
2. I just hate people, I hate the fact that they're fake and I hate the fact that they have to pretend to like me, gosh if you don't like me just stay away.
3. Stop assuming things, because for fucking goodness sakes it's fucking annoying and it's annoying. I think that's just the best way to put it.
4. I'm invited to a house party on friday and I probably can't go because of parents, school and transport, which adds to this irky mood I am in right now and I finally feel like part of something.
5. I bought alcohol which I'm neglecting (soon about to change, maybe) because drinking it would make me feel absolutely guilty and I have school tomorrow and don't wanna turn up off my face.
6. There's gotta be more to my life than always doing school work or even going to school. I'm 18, and I'm boring and I'm hating this.
7. I want a normal relationship.
8. I want to be able to do what I want whenever I want.
9. Now I want to cry.
10. BUT NO, I HAVE ENGLISH TO DO.
11. I wish I could play God like Tyrell or Frankenstein and I wouldn't use my powers to create replicants or monsters and use them as slaves, I would just use my powers to give myself the power to go on a holiday and live on an island with people I want and not have to care about things that I do about now, if that makes sense.
This steam release thing is kinda working. I feel somewhat better now.
Back to english then....
Also, I know that people read my blog, it's kinda obvious so don't act like you don't know about any of this shit because that just pisses me off too, gah i need chocolate.
1. Apart from clubbing my birthday was not as fun as I had planned, it was way different than what I wanted in the first place and I guess that was my fault.
2. I just hate people, I hate the fact that they're fake and I hate the fact that they have to pretend to like me, gosh if you don't like me just stay away.
3. Stop assuming things, because for fucking goodness sakes it's fucking annoying and it's annoying. I think that's just the best way to put it.
4. I'm invited to a house party on friday and I probably can't go because of parents, school and transport, which adds to this irky mood I am in right now and I finally feel like part of something.
5. I bought alcohol which I'm neglecting (soon about to change, maybe) because drinking it would make me feel absolutely guilty and I have school tomorrow and don't wanna turn up off my face.
6. There's gotta be more to my life than always doing school work or even going to school. I'm 18, and I'm boring and I'm hating this.
7. I want a normal relationship.
8. I want to be able to do what I want whenever I want.
9. Now I want to cry.
10. BUT NO, I HAVE ENGLISH TO DO.
11. I wish I could play God like Tyrell or Frankenstein and I wouldn't use my powers to create replicants or monsters and use them as slaves, I would just use my powers to give myself the power to go on a holiday and live on an island with people I want and not have to care about things that I do about now, if that makes sense.
This steam release thing is kinda working. I feel somewhat better now.
Back to english then....
Also, I know that people read my blog, it's kinda obvious so don't act like you don't know about any of this shit because that just pisses me off too, gah i need chocolate.
DAY 187
I still love you as much as I did from day 1, which is not much :P
Nah, I love you heaps more and I think, I hope you see that. Gosh I'm lovesick it's so fucking lame and lameeeee. But yeah. Also today I was extremely happy and tired. I felt drunk, BUT i didn't actually drink anything. It's like the feeling I get from drinking heaps and heaps of RedBull and just losing all the energy. Just like you said. I use up my energy way too quickly and run out before the day even starts. Yeah no more of that bullshit.
Just wanted to say HAPPY 187th DAYVERSARRY :):)
♥
because everyday with you is significant
:)
Nah, I love you heaps more and I think, I hope you see that. Gosh I'm lovesick it's so fucking lame and lameeeee. But yeah. Also today I was extremely happy and tired. I felt drunk, BUT i didn't actually drink anything. It's like the feeling I get from drinking heaps and heaps of RedBull and just losing all the energy. Just like you said. I use up my energy way too quickly and run out before the day even starts. Yeah no more of that bullshit.
Just wanted to say HAPPY 187th DAYVERSARRY :):)
♥
because everyday with you is significant
:)
Sunday, May 22, 2011
surprise surprise
Firstly happy birthday doshi, the only reason I'm actually mentioning this is because I just turned 18 last week and this little boy only turned 16 today, I would say that this is hilarious but that would be a complete understatement.
On a completely different note I've been feeling really, not really pessimistic but more realistic. I've just been thinking a lot, not of English though cause it's not like I have an assessment in two days, but of just life, my life and my boyfriend's life and how much I could possibly ruin things even more than I already have. I've been thinking of getting alcohol, the small bottles, 1 to build my cool bottle collection 2 because I found some that apparently taste nice. The problem is I don't actually like alcohol very much and drinking it by myself would just be sad. I also don't have that much money, LIE, I do have money but there's so many people's birthdays coming up and I can just see myself going broke and I don't want that to happen so I shall save up.
I cried last night, yeah that's all with that.
I really want to get this essay written so at least I feel like I've accomplished something but it's just so boring and I constantly am thinking of Sumeet and I want to be with him right now and just cuddle with him and have him hold my hand. And we could be studying together, like that when he came over and my parents made us sit in the front lounge room, he'd sneak a kiss here and there. I thought that was really sweet. I feel like things have changed so much and I keep looking back at the memories, good and bad however the good outweighing the bad and I wish that I could be with him for the rest of my life, well the good stuff anyway but like I don't actually think about the future, it just scares me. Truthfully I don't actually think further than a month, like I don't imagine things or anything like that because I'm afraid of getting my hopes up or just having a different outcome from what I had expected. Anyways no more from my very philosophical views and I shall do this english thing now because I wanna be off my face tomorrow night. LOL, jk my mum will have a go at me if she found out I was drinking EVEN though I am 18 now and could technically live on my own without them watching over me 24/7.
Yes, shuttup.
i love mysely.
laters bytchess.
On a completely different note I've been feeling really, not really pessimistic but more realistic. I've just been thinking a lot, not of English though cause it's not like I have an assessment in two days, but of just life, my life and my boyfriend's life and how much I could possibly ruin things even more than I already have. I've been thinking of getting alcohol, the small bottles, 1 to build my cool bottle collection 2 because I found some that apparently taste nice. The problem is I don't actually like alcohol very much and drinking it by myself would just be sad. I also don't have that much money, LIE, I do have money but there's so many people's birthdays coming up and I can just see myself going broke and I don't want that to happen so I shall save up.
I cried last night, yeah that's all with that.
I really want to get this essay written so at least I feel like I've accomplished something but it's just so boring and I constantly am thinking of Sumeet and I want to be with him right now and just cuddle with him and have him hold my hand. And we could be studying together, like that when he came over and my parents made us sit in the front lounge room, he'd sneak a kiss here and there. I thought that was really sweet. I feel like things have changed so much and I keep looking back at the memories, good and bad however the good outweighing the bad and I wish that I could be with him for the rest of my life, well the good stuff anyway but like I don't actually think about the future, it just scares me. Truthfully I don't actually think further than a month, like I don't imagine things or anything like that because I'm afraid of getting my hopes up or just having a different outcome from what I had expected. Anyways no more from my very philosophical views and I shall do this english thing now because I wanna be off my face tomorrow night. LOL, jk my mum will have a go at me if she found out I was drinking EVEN though I am 18 now and could technically live on my own without them watching over me 24/7.
Yes, shuttup.
i love mysely.
laters bytchess.
Tuesday, May 17, 2011
sexmonths
Today is 17th May 2011.
It's been six months since you asked me out. And since then, I've felt like the most luckiest girl in the world. I absolutely love you babe, and only you.
♥
It's been six months since you asked me out. And since then, I've felt like the most luckiest girl in the world. I absolutely love you babe, and only you.
♥
Sunday, May 15, 2011
Saturday, May 7, 2011
Incomplete
I made a changed the link to my tumblr account: Tumblr.
And it's like EIGHT DAYS, more like seven, but yeah, till my Birthday! And the worst part is, whenever I think 18, I think Sumeet. Is that just sad or what.
I'm constantly finding ways of distracting myself but I'm still crying and I can't get over it. It just shits me that all this happened and it's not fair, I could've been the one to get hurt and not both of us.
Yeah, I really don't have anything to say except I'm sorry for ever coming into your life then ruining it.
And it's like EIGHT DAYS, more like seven, but yeah, till my Birthday! And the worst part is, whenever I think 18, I think Sumeet. Is that just sad or what.
I'm constantly finding ways of distracting myself but I'm still crying and I can't get over it. It just shits me that all this happened and it's not fair, I could've been the one to get hurt and not both of us.
Yeah, I really don't have anything to say except I'm sorry for ever coming into your life then ruining it.
Sunday, May 1, 2011
Purple
I wonder what sex feels like.
Feel free to demonstrate anytime you want.
I don't know what it is with shopping and me, especially at DFO. I constantly find myself overspending yet all the things I buy are >$5. But whatever, gotta do my best to look hot for my babeee.
Feel free to demonstrate anytime you want.
I don't know what it is with shopping and me, especially at DFO. I constantly find myself overspending yet all the things I buy are >$5. But whatever, gotta do my best to look hot for my babeee.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)