Onions

I fell asleep. When I woke up I thought it was Friday. How embarassing.

Today was pretty good day. Careers Market. Seriously I don't know why I needed to get so much things but whatever. I have a pile of books now which I plan to read on later when I don't get headaches from reading.

Watch this:

http://vimeo.com/5375317



Being with you makes me happy.

Isn't it great

I've managed to stay off MSN for around a couple of hours now. Which I mean is a great thing. i've started my English thing and everythings AT THIS MOMENT is good. I'm happy. I'm scared though, that as soon as I log on to MSN this mood of mine will slowly disappear and so that's why I've decided not to go on it Just yet.

Work Experience Summary Day 4
Wow, work experience is coming to it's end especially now that I'm actually enjoying it. Why did I choose this date to do so, I know why but sighhhh.

fun: 8
boring: 1
people: 9
stress: 1
work: 1

Much more improvment especially compared to yesterday. Today was even more of a bludge and yeah. And I got to teach them stuff. Well Debbie. She wanted me to show her how to use Photoshop and Windows Movie Maker and I felt so good being able to teach her how to use it because she's 3 times older than me and I knew more than her. Too bad Kate wasn't there today (but she did come at one stage to send something off) so it was really quiet but David (my boss, their boss, THE boss; who really doesn't act like a boss) was singing and whistling and it was funny and random because Debbie was getting annoyed and I couldn't help but laugh. I'm gonna miss them so much. I don't want work experience to stop. I don't want to go back to school. I just like things the way they are now. I guess this can't happen. So yeah. Anyways right now I'm just making their THANK YOU cards. I've personalised each one so that they've been personalised and I really hope that they like the cards because I know I've put effort into them (unlike Deby; who handmakes ALL the cards that they send out). I don't have time to get them presents neither do I have money. I just hope I've put something into their business which has been a good and positive change.

:D

Max is Delicious

I am now 16 years and 1 day old. Fascinating. Not really. The day after my birthday isn’t that bad. It began with the usual, swimming and I just couldn’t find my game today. No matter how hard I’d tried I couldn’t swim to the best of my abilities which sucked because I wanted to be heaps good and not so slow. In the end it was still worth it because I was told that I was going to move up to the fitness club thing which is actually easier than the Bronze squad thing so I’m all good. That actually made me feel better ‘bout myself so isn’t that nice.

Coming home I was back to the usual routine of doing house chores but I was going to be saved thanks to Ate Sugar. She was going to take me out. But before that happened I had to help mum cut some pork for the food she’s gonna cook for the surprise party later for our family friend. But yeah. Lucky for me, Ate Sugar was going to take me to Max Brenners and oooh. I got food orgasms. HAHA, that’s the nicest way of putting it. Seriously. And I stole some of Alyssa’s food (which btw, wouldn’t have been there if I hadn’t asked her to come with us). In the end it’s been a great day..so far. I wonder what the rest of the day will bring.

;]

HAHA, i'm not laughing

Over and over again
cause it's all in my head...

I woke up this morning, up and ready to go swimming. Lately, waking up in a Saturday morning I've felt more enthusiastic about going swimming. I don't know why this is the case but it's a good thing. I got there and Julia was back. Yey? And because I was there early she asked if i wanted to join the early class and I did it, which meant i finished earlier. Woo, I could do all the things she said EXCEPT for the fact that I couldn't breathe, but that's just me. So yeah.

Now i'm at home and like I'm doing the first part of the Healthy Assignment which I find a complete waste of time because it is. So yeah. While looking for info I came upon this (http://www.reachout.com.au/default.asp?ti=1866) I thought it was a good website and it really gave me help on what was wrong with me.

Why I'm feeling crap:

• You have experienced one or several big or small stressful events or tough times.

So yeah. It may have been cause by one of the following:

• Family problems
• Relationship or friendship problems - breaking up with someone or fighting.
• Starting at a new school or job.
• Being a carer or living with someone with a mental or physical illness.
• Feeling bored or unstimulated, e.g. in the school holidays.
• Not eating well
• Not getting enough exercise
• Not getting enough sleep
• Illness - being sick, or fighting off illness, can make you feel run down and unwell
• Hormonal changes in females during your menstrual cycle can make you feel crap. This may happen a few days before you get your period and you may not make the connection immediately.

As you can see it's not all of it, it's a few of those reasons. I'm not going to go into detail into that but yeh. I'm going to admit it. I FEEL CRAP. And the only thing I can do about it which will work is to express my feelings, but that will cause me to feel more crap and make the whole everything worse. So i will just deal with it and keep my mouth shut. My happiness doesn't matter, just as long as everyone elses is fine.

And just to get things straight now, I'm not emo. I don't fucking cut myself or even listen to emo music. I don't even dress emo. So fuck off. I'm not fucking emo.

Must finish this.

laters,.
;]

p.s.

WORD FEELING OF THE DAY:
"CRAP"

If you want to be happy, be

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Don't care what people say

Just follow your own way
Don't give up and lose the chance

To return to innocence

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