Classy, very classy.

So long story short I decided to perform intercouse in the toilets today. That's what happened in my dream. Gosh my dreams get dirtier by the day or night depends what time I'm sleeping.

Best girlfriend ever, that's me. I eat heaps, I talk heaps, I sleep heaps, I troll heaps. What more could this guy want. Hhaha, anyways on a much brighter and cleaner note I love Sumeet that I've even written a poem about him.

Sumeet
he doesn't care what I eat
he ain't neat
sorry sumeet
:P
i love him
hindi sya maitim.
that's is all
about sumeet-im


Hehe, sif not like that.
♥

I really need to study. I'm just glad you are.

This is What You Call Fun

At the moment I'm at Jasmine's house and I'm lying down on her sister's bed pretending to be her. It's fun here. Seriously and her house is so cool.

Just a few things:
- City2Surf tomorrow.
- Jasmine's house is cool.
- I got a new bed cover.
- Picture :)

Giving Up

I’ve been lying to myself. I'm trying to show myself that I'm happy. The truth is I am happy but there’s times when I just want to cry because I know that something isn’t right and that I don’t really have what I want. But on that basis not everyone gets what they want. There’s just not balance in that. So, the reason I wanted to talk about this was because I saw Bilal today. Really, yeah. He was one of my classmates at my old school and I once had a thing for me. At first I didn’t think that I liked him and that I'm just a stupid little girl. But now that I'm older and more mature and realising my true feelings towards others I kinda miss him. We weren’t close. Well at one point we were. Me, Samantha, Tyler and Bilal. We were a group that was happy and hung around each other at lunchtime and played handball. Those good old days. But as the years passed I began focusing on my studies, Tyler & Bilal and Samantha on whatever she was doing and we seemed to just separate. Thinking about it just makes me want to cry. I'm so sad (the stupid, lame, sad). Back to the story. In year 5 or maybe 6 I had a crush on him or liked him whichever one and in year 5 was the year I started going down. The people whom I hung around were very influential and they were the so-called ‘popular’ group and I was part of that. And so I liked him. But because of my genius ability he treated me like a calculator and whenever he saw me he would always ask me multiplication questions which I found annoying but what can I do. So yeah. I don’t know. The same thing still happens to me. I'm still the same unwanted girl except now I'm not even the smart one. I don’t have any traits that people like; even my laugh is becoming more and more hideous as days pass. I think it might be your fault. Not just you but a lot of you put together. All of you have impacted on so many parts of my life which has turned me into who I am now. Confused about who I am and always doubting every decision I make because of the fear of what you did to me occurring again. And you know what it hurts. Bad. I'm not gonna listen to what anyone says. I know that I'm not the best person in the world nor am I the prettiest and I'm quite sure that I'm overweight and if you are going to tell me that I'm not overweight and it’s just baby fat or muscle then FUCK off. I don’t give a fuck what you think because I know the truth and it’s time for me to accept who I really am and see me as me without pretending to be anyone else and try so hard to fit in with everyone else even though I know that I'm the odd one out. The one who’s always quiet because she doesn’t belong. I don’t like that. I don’t like being excluded. Nor do I like being included because you feel sorry for me or because you have to. I just want to fit in with people who are there. I just want one person who I can rely on and is HERE in Australia. I know that if I was in Philippines life would be a blast because I have family and friends there and we had the money too. AND for fuck’s sake people I'm not fucking rich. Gosh. I can’t even save money. The money I have, I have to work for that and I'm annoyed now. This was just meant to be a heartfelt blog and now it’s turned into something else. IT’S YOU FUCKING FAULT. Why did you have to exist in my life?

Today was late. I don’t like being late very much. Now that I'm in SRC and actually got what I wanted I don’t want it to be thrown away because of the bus driver. It’s not fair. The day was rather short really. Maths, well it was maths. No ANGEL either, so I was quite disappointed. Commerce on the other hand, well it was boring too. But the good thing is that for once I understood what the lesson was about, the first time in a long time. And that made me feel proud. At lunchtime it was funny because Xu was annoying us and he was trying to kick the ball and he failed. Literally. I, Jasmine, the retard who just sucks at soccer, is better than Xu. Woah huh. It was hilarious. Sport was afterwards which was the same as last week. Full of fun and laughter. I can’t help it. I just laugh at the most random things and I don’t like it. It’s actually really annoying. Highlights were teasing Jasmine and Himmat’s goals, Jasmine’s headbutt ? I forgot what it was called. I'm pretty sure is not that. The thing you do when you hit the ball with your head. Uhm playing Around the World with Anavi which we didn’t actually finish, the freak bus which started vibrating and freaked me out (and made me look like a super idiot because I jumped out of my seat), my REALLY REALLY REALLY lame call about how I’ve made so many fail calls to Sukhman and I was like something about calling him on his phone. Basically it was just that bad. Then we got back to school and I decided that I wanted to go home early and walked really fast and still managed to miss the train as I have been doing a lot lately (the miss the train part) so I went back to the plaza and sat there with Jasmine and Himmat. Oooh, I showed them my arm right and Himmat was like woah that’s huge and he was like arm wrestle and he said it feels like I'm vs.ing a tank guy and I stopped and looked at his arm cause they were huge too and then I realised that he just called me a guy and had a mini go at him and then I slapped my head and then he and jasmine made fun of that. He then began to mock me and it was funny shit. Jasmine² couldn’t stop laughing and it was just funny. We went to the station and we ran up the stairs. Wow, was I in pain. But yeah, now I'm home so it’s all good. I'm being a good girl and helping my mum because I have to make up for tomorrow and I know what I gonna wear. Kinda.

At the moment it feels like I can relate to the song I Hate That I Love You & Been Waiting. I don’t know why but whatever right. HAHA. One last thing:

I'm over you, so get over yourself.

Arrivederci.

HB JASMINE

I can’t believe that on all the days that I'm hardly on the computer is the day of my friend’s birthday. But don’t worry, I'm hoping I can still post a blog. And if this is being read by people apart from me then obviously I have not missed blogging on this very special day.

Anyways I woke up right, like really early. Uhm, 5.30. Because I wanted to prepare Jasmine’s cake like early so I can still do other stuff. Fail. Got nothing done. Practically was late for the bus but the cake was done. Only thing I accomplished in the morning. Oh and getting her the prettiest rose we had in our garden. Look at the cake. Yum.

The night before. More like midnight, I stayed up late trying to make a friggin paper rose. But well done to me. I did it and accomplished it. Another photo opportunity. I'm gonna summarize the rest of this blog.

Jasmine’s day was awesome. Both of ours actually. I hid from her in roll call, which didn’t work. And yeah. I'm gonna be in trouble if I stay in the computer any longer but JASMINE, mate happy birthday, like that hasn’t been said enough but too bad. Not gonna say anymore about her birthday because I know a lot of other people are gonna write about it. Just visit Anavi’s or Jasmine’s page and I'm pretty sure they’ll give you better detail.

Tennis today. Walked to OFFICEWORKS. Uhm, waited there for like an hour. Got bored.

Oooh, you must see my new mouse. Another photo.

Hehe. Bye.

1,2,3

utterly confused?



I thought I knew what it felt like to know that you like someone, but over and over I again, I keep wondering whether do i? (or don't i?, da da dann!)[stupid sumeet, look what you did, I was all serious but now I've lightened the mood. HEY! that was a good thing, thanks mate] Anyways back to this. I really do want to know.



Today I could just some it up in a couple of lines:

House - curled section of hair (omg, someone thought I made a mistake and that's why i did it like that.)
Roll Call - quick yet good.
Period 1 - laughing then pissed
Recess - spent my time avoiding people
Period 2 -gay, still pissed PLUS seating plan
Period 3 - better, stupid class gave me an applause when I cam back from the toilet.
Lucnh - people pissed at me, oh well
Period 4 - good (:
Bus Stop - randomly random
Bus - sad, after realising that I might like someone and will miss them dearly.


Now, was just eating a very lovely and yummyy tuna sandwhich which I made myself (or did i ? da da dannn !) And I also realised that whenever I write this closing line that I'm always eating, which no wonder I'm bigger than small. HAHA, i still remember that.
So for now it's
Laters,..

FYI: I LOVE JASMINEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE (: [ LOL jasmine, do u get it ? ;) ]